Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Vonny Vonny Vonsinh Free Sayloune

Ever wonder the identity of the real Lord of the Flies. Well after extensive dialogue, intensive assessments, and illegal interrogation I have uncovered the real ‘Magnate of the Diptera’...Vonny Vonny Vonsinh Free Sayloune. Esquire Sayloune, much like Johnny Depp, engulfs himself in character roles. As the ‘Lord’ he masterfully personified protagonist Ralph's charisma and leadership while seamlessly illustrating the barbaric and maniacal antagonist in Jack. Those were some polarized and difficult class sessions to say the least; one minute trying to set up an English IV government and the next attempting to put someones head on a stick.  Similarly to the innocent Simon, Vonsinh would often philosophize about morality and human goodness.  I general, however, I tried to simply isolate Von much the same as the hunting party does in the text...he just creeped me out.  In the end, his loyalty to the text earned him the highest average in the class over the course of the Lord of the Flies unit.  Congrats Vonsinh Sayloune...English Geek of the Week!

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Taylor Wild

Conspiracy Theory #501...Taylor Wild is not a mortal.  What is he then: alien, cyborg, demigod, or combination-cyliengod? For the doubters or nonbelievers, below is a list of researched, tangible evidence collected by a team of one scientist who is totally nonbias to personal hypotheses:

1. T-Baby looks eerily similar to the fabled sage, Yoda.  Additionally, he often uses ‘force’ and speaks in chiasmus and paradox.
2. How often does always happen...never.  How often does never happen...always.  Well T-Skillet never misses assignments and is always conscientious of his grade.  Normal, I think not.
3. T-Dawg is maintaining a rare “A” average in Senior English AND positive attitude.  As a merciless educator, consistently telling a student “You are consistently awesome” consistently bruises the ego when consistently said educator consistently says “You are terrible; please remember to breath”.
4. T-Fresh openly seeks deeper enrichment of classroom activities and discussion. Oh yeah, not even play’n.  Flow with this, a Senior, week before Christmas break, grade in-da-bank, on Santa’s nice list, still actively participating in class. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...not human!

Congrats Taylor Wild...English Geek of the Week!

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Ben(icide) Mullins

The 7.1 Billion inhabitants of planet earth need to ready themselves for the rise of another egregiously diabolical and psychologically elite supreme dictator.  Ben(icide) Mullins proudly preserves the most important character traits a solid dictator should possess:

• long hair and beard

• educated questioning
• tireless climb to perfection
• military training (video game training acceptable)
• superior debate and communication skills
• desire to crush the seemingly weak and everyone with a heartbeat
• outwardly emotionless yet poignant

Ben(icide)s dream is to one day be in charge of everyone else’s dream. After English IV, his training will be near complete for his total world domination tour. Who knew mastery of Renaissance Lit could lead to such powerful things?!? Congrats Ben(icide) Mullins...English Geek of the Week!

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Jackson Dickerson

I am Jackson Dickerson’s biggest fan.  I know he wakes everyday at 6:59 a.m., showers using Suave Coconut shampoo, and brushes his hair with a Goody Natural Fiber brush.  I know Jackson’s favorite sweatpants are the Black Nike ones he hangs on the back of his door and always eats Quaker Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal for breakfast… in the individual packets. My favorite part of Jackson’s day is in the evenings when he reads Hamlet, works through textual meanings and the importance/weight of the various literary elements Shakespeare uses.  Jackson and I share this same love of Shakespeare.  We share study sessions, kind of, in the evenings.  He labors on understanding Hamlets’ various motives for his actions, and I drudge laboriously on creating an impossible test titled Examlet.  I would love to ask my hero, Jackson, Hamlet questions sometimes, but asking questions through binoculars and windows is difficult.  Congrats Jackson Dickerson...English Geek of the Week.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Robert DeSersa

********** BREAKING NEWS **********

The first confirmed Dawes County case of Shakespearian Vertigo was established this week in room #207 of Chadron High School. Chadron Senior Robert DeSersa was confirmed to have the parasite after exhibiting 7 of 9 known symptoms. Although allowed to mingle with the general population, the parasite is extremely contagious, entering through the eyes and ears and inhabiting the brain.  Although rare, the condition can become chronic and affect the heart...forever.  Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

• shouting “Illo, Ho, Ho my lord” when seeking someone’s attention.
• skipping daily tasks to read words few can understand
• understanding words nobody else can understand
• developing a taste for pickled herring which contributes to terrible flatulence
• speaking in extended metaphor and English accents
• finding Elizabethan humor seriously funny and tragedy worthy of public mourning
• bleeding from the eyes and ears
• believing that speaking in fourteen line quatrains and couplets is cool

Robert DeSersa is in stable condition at this time; however, the extent of his parasitic infestation is unknown and symptom list continues to grow. Note, wearing combat boots everyday is not a symptom, Robert just wears them because he is awesome. Congrats Robert DeSersa, English Geek of the Week.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

KayLeah Deines(aur)

Shel Silverstein...yawn. Judy Blume...who dat? Do not even mention Stan Berenstain; he in ‘da past, umm-hmm. Dr. Seuss, that homie ...well, never mind he still throws sweet game from beyond the grave. BUT, there is a new player in the metropolis of Children’s Lit and she is spitting some mad skills, KayLeah Deines(aur).  This prehistoric lizard’s ability to utilize wit, irony, sarcasm, hyperbole, and satire among a host of other elements is understatedly masterful (yes, she would appreciate the use of the previous paradox). Anyway, if you are looking for an invigorating read, and a children’s book not suitable for children (yes, more paradox) I heard she will be signing the copy of her Children’s satire “Stay up - Sleep In” sometime Friday after school.  Congrats KayLeah Deines(aur), English Geek of the Week.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Lane Jersild

What does a moustache symbolize? Thrived through the 1970’s...chief firefighter in a New York borough...cowboy outlaw posing for wanted poster...chilly upper lip?  At Chadron High School, the moustache symbolizes greatness.  Many have donned this prolific and storied strip of coarse fiber, but one current individual is logging yet another chapter of awesome into this hairy history-Lane Jersild.  Although seemingly quiet and slow to task, Lane is an academic ninja using the ‘stache and uninvolved/unattached persona as a front to scholarly greatness. Mastery of an epic… “Meh”.  Systematic deconstruction of Greek/Latin Vocabulary Review Test… “Yawn”.  ‘A’ average to start the second quarter… “Ain’t no thing but a chicken wing.”  Congrats master of moustache and king of kicked-back - Lane Jersild - English Geek of the Week.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Keenan Johnson

The Grecian Sparta focused their holistic attention to military dominance, character perfection, and educational excellence. English IV is often compared to Sparta via the vigorous curriculum, intense exercise, as-well-as divine stature and character of those enrolled in the course...those coined English Spartans often possess ‘ripped and chiseled’ brains and bodies.  One English Spartan has proven himself exceptionally worthy of the Crimson Cloak, Keenan Johnson.  At the Proelium ab Invenio Charta  (Battle of Research Paper) Keenan proved victorious earning an ‘A’ despite many casualties and losses. Again, at the Bellum ab Lacuna (War of Words/Vocabulary) Keenan possessed great strength and fortitude against the Latin and Greek Root Word Giants.  So here’s to you, Crimson donning English Spartan, Keenan Johnson,Geek of the Week!

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Sydney Blome

Excerpt from Sydney Blome’s Journal, titled “Why I want to teach English”...

I rilly, rilly want to teech english because english is my favrit and im rilly rilly gud at it. someday i hope two git a english job and help kids reed and rite the rite way like i was teeched. to jump start my career i have been reeding reserch papers and giv’n kids help with grammer and fluincy and helping their manuskript form. i hurryed and got my paper dun two help and have reed alot of papers and feel reel gud and nice inside. ive helped mr uhing not git frustrated grading papers by reeding and catching mistakes. i think im his favrite but he says no he laughs when he reeds my papers i think because he is so happy at the gud job im doing. Congrats to English Geek of the Week and future English teacher, Sydney Blome.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Moses Lakabung

“Let my people go!” exclaimed Moses. I looked upon Moses, not knowing his plight...did I cause this outburst? “You’re going down pharaoh, down to the Red Sea fool” growled the now impassioned Moses with the whole of his being.  Timidly, I approached Moses and said “Hey dude, you ok today?” Moses gazed into my eyes, then bluntly stated “I am almighty Moses, listen to what I have to say...I will achieve an ‘A’ on every single annotated bibliography written for this research project, because I am Moses!”  Breaking down and cowering in the corner I managed to say “I agree, but-but-but don’t hurt me.” Moses then giggled and said “Chill Mr. Uhing, I am in character for my various governmental leadership styles paper; I am trying to write with voice!” Congrats Moses Lakabung...English Geek of the Week.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Trace Strotheide

Wore a hole in the billet of my saddle, so I moseyed on down to the local tack and saddlery shop seeking a textile strong enough to endure a fiery-eyed filly which needed a-break’n. I asked the weathered cattleman from behind the counter for a strap of rawhide, naugahyde, or chamois-hide for my pillion. The man heartily chuckled and handed me Strotheide...Trace Strotheide to be exact.  He stated that Trace Strotheide has never failed woman or man, proves toughest in the most difficult of situations (especially Vocabulary terms), and is the most trusted product by 100% of the Block 1a Seniors to always possess the correct answer. Be’ins the product carried a strong history, I purchased one...been satisfied everyday since.  Congrats Trace Strotheide...English Geek of the Week.

Geek of the Week

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Andrea Clark

Once upon a time, in an enchanted forest, far-far away (obviously) lived a bright young scholar named Andreaella.  Andreaella diligently studied her fingers to the bone, often waking well before sun-up to fabricate her award winning outlines and sing to the birds. Her evil Step-Teacher, Mr. PewUhing, often punished Andreaella for seemingly irrelevant grammatical and fluency mishaps… but Andreaella continued her studies, singing to birds, and put on an apron (not really, but adds awesome dramatic effect to the story). Andreaella hoped her Prince charming would come, or the Block 3 mice would one day save her...but it never happened...she was stuck in Mr. PewUhing’s class until December (symbolically barren, cold, and harsh). Thus, the tale ends with Andreaella continuing her writing brilliance and diligence- but to no avail! Congrats Andrea Clark...English Geek of the Week!

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Ashtyn Nelson

Scouting Report: A clutch gamer you want in control when ‘it’ matters.

Alias: The Regulator

Favorite Quote: “Ash-Bash; Ash-Smash”

Practice performance…meh. 

Contest, competition, gala performance… seize the largest bough you can locate, hide the elderly and young-ins ‘cause it’s on like Donkey Kong!

Final Exam Outlook and Forecast: TOR-CON Index 8+; Saffir-Simpson Hurricane Scale 5; Richter Scale Reading 5.0; 800 millibars barometric pressure.

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Alec Burk

Alec Burk is interviewing cabinet members for BurkNation, a new political movement seeking rebellion of Language Arts despotism.  However, to successfully overthrow this excessively dominant system Alec and BurkNation are challenged with an insurmountable quest…mastering an ever-changing, tenacious beast.  Boasting an average gpa less plausible than the existence of unicorns and mermaids, Alec and BurkNation are riding the English train (Toot! Toot!) to the end of the line. Poetic journey patterns…GET OFF THE TRACK; didactic lessons…HOW DOES 12,000 TONS FEEL TO THE FACE.  Romantic elements…THIS AIN’T NO LITTLE RED CABOOSE “I THINK I CAN” TRAIN. Congrats Alec BurkNation, English Geek of the Week!

Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Ashley Hills

Test architects at the State Department of Education are currently in panic mode over Ashley “Claymore” Hills.  One intercepted email coined her “an insatiable reading disease we have no modern cure for”.  An anonymous personal assistant to one test draughts-women reported Ashley being referred to as a “conceptual Godzilla capable of a Biblical assessment apocalypse” before breaking into tears, abandoning her hamsters, and moving to Rio de Janeiro. Supposedly, Ashley received her nickname “Claymore” because she reminded researchers of a human bomb…target always eliminated or really, really, really, compromised…a solid trait for someone answering questions over a text they recently inhale, but implausible obstacle for test makers working hard to fail students.  Congrats Ashley Hills, keep fighting the good fight!