Geek of the Week

(An unconventionally sweet and awesome honor!)

Robert DeSersa

********** BREAKING NEWS **********

The first confirmed Dawes County case of Shakespearian Vertigo was established this week in room #207 of Chadron High School. Chadron Senior Robert DeSersa was confirmed to have the parasite after exhibiting 7 of 9 known symptoms. Although allowed to mingle with the general population, the parasite is extremely contagious, entering through the eyes and ears and inhabiting the brain.  Although rare, the condition can become chronic and affect the heart...forever.  Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

• shouting “Illo, Ho, Ho my lord” when seeking someone’s attention.
• skipping daily tasks to read words few can understand
• understanding words nobody else can understand
• developing a taste for pickled herring which contributes to terrible flatulence
• speaking in extended metaphor and English accents
• finding Elizabethan humor seriously funny and tragedy worthy of public mourning
• bleeding from the eyes and ears
• believing that speaking in fourteen line quatrains and couplets is cool

Robert DeSersa is in stable condition at this time; however, the extent of his parasitic infestation is unknown and symptom list continues to grow. Note, wearing combat boots everyday is not a symptom, Robert just wears them because he is awesome. Congrats Robert DeSersa, English Geek of the Week.